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Song for the Old White Bois’ Club

Scummo Lake

BONKARAMA CANBERRA

Don’t step out of line, girly,
I’ll run me blokey hormones all over yer,
You’re a cute little blonde from the junior staff
and you’re gonna learn who’s boss round here.

It’s Canberra bonkarama,
where men are men and run the show,
Put on your glad rags and take my arm
or your career will have to go.

CHORUS:

Bonkarama, Canberra
Bonkarama, Canberra
Where men are serious
and women are nervous.
Bonkarama, Canberra
Bonkarama, Canberra
There’s sexual potential
in the power differential,
It’s just good old human frailty
To lech after female beauty,
You can trust our daggy leader
whatever crap he feeds yer,
Bonkarama, Canberra
Bonkarama, Canberra.

Jinjirrie, November 2020

Related Links

Inside the Canberra bubble: Liberal ministers’ relationships with staffers prompted ‘bonk ban’

Christian Porter was warned over public behaviour with young female staffer by then-prime minister Malcolm Turnbull


The Canberra bubble investigation points to an underlying problem we seem to see over and over again
Michael Pascoe: Hypocrisy and smokescreens cloud the ‘Canberra Bubble’
Ghosts of the past come back to haunt PM
A former staffer for Liberal frontbencher Alan Tudge has claimed she felt “belittled” and “bullied” by him and wants the PM to investigate.

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Exit Mango Turtle Right?

Mango Turtle

Let me count the ways

all the amerikkkan beauties,
these squawling babies
wailing and whining
for the mango trumpolini,
detachable dicks prickling
on the streets howling –
who gave guns to infants
to spray shit on the wall
when they don’t get their
caterwauling way?
was it the walrus,
the pet goat,
the cat in the hat,
the goose or the gander,
thomas the tank engine
chugging across the
privatised stolen land of oz,
humpty trumpty or huck finn,
tweedle dum or tweedle dee?
pulitzer or pulling yourself?
the people can take back
the profits of their labour
from the profiteers
of the animal farm
only when the swaddling twaddle
is ripped away,
coo coo achoooo!

Jinjirrie, November 2020

Trump thinks he won

November 8, 2020

Trumpolini clings to his throne
Like a dog with a juicy bone,
Soon in a cell he’ll be alone,
His official protection blown.

Jinjirrie, November 2020

#ConcedeTrump

There once was a man who wouldn’t concede,
Narcissism wreaks ironic hubris,
So they’ll recount the vote till all agree
Trump’s the whiniest loser in US history.

Jinjirrie, November 2020

Yeah Right, Pull the Other One aka Open Proxies

Blame Russia, China and Iran,
Scapegoats for a convenient
Trumpolini election scam,
Banking on collective narcissism
Of a rotting, desperate empire
in the final stages of disintegration.

Jinjirrie, November 2020

#BonkBan

#ScottytheBully is the epitome of misogyny,
Interrupts and wanks over Ruston casually,
Dismissing exploitative front bench lechery,
And the culture of sexism endemic in the LNP.

Jinjirrie, November 2020

Related

Deep Within a Journalistic Silo
It’s only taken 6 years for journalists to discuss this.

NB Edit to Humpty Trumpty in ‘Let me count the ways’ snitched from Phillip Adams
Scummo interrupts Anne Ruston

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Budgets and Rorts – Verse from the Tipping Point

Coffee

Panegyric Arabica

At a birthday bash in a dairy shed,
I explained surplus value to a sneering capo,
“Don’t you dare quote Marx at me!” he said,
His profits built enslaving islanders
On plantations for baristas’ daily bread,
Bourg coffee shops and crass latte sippers,
In horror, I picked up my stuff and fled,
Yet the rich prick was riddled with rot,
A year later, I hear he’s dead.
We’ll party on and roast his loss,
One less monocultural shithead.

October 2020

The RRP

The most sensuous courting
is lucrative rooting and rorting,
shady deals under the sheets
are the zenith of bliss for LNPs.

The critical X factor
run over by a tractor,
Whatever he’s done,
she don’t need to know.

It’ll take more than an ICAC
to uncover the real facts
They’re all up to their knees
In pork grease and sleaze.

October 2020

Budget Rort


The Scummos hijack the country,
stick a straw in the treasure,
a gloating, smirking transaction,
kick the poor and women for pleasure,
construction-led is con-extraction,
siphoning it up to dirty mates
to store in offshore banks –
“A rightful trickle-up!”, they swank,
national audit office nobbled
to entrench a rorted economy,
Australians fleeced by corrruption,
depraved rich toads toast perfidy.

October 2020

Budget 2020

Scummo funds faith-based quackery,
Replacing science and logic with chicanery
so folks won’t discern political fuckery,
$61.4m to school chaplains and just
$16.9m to Indigenous health an obscene travesty.

October 2020

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Poetry in the Time of COVID19

Feeding the Chooks

Schadenfreude

For decades they sneered
at us backward banana benders,
behind by 50 years they reckon,
we endured Bjelke’s curses of faded kitchen curtains,
daylight farm slaving and cow’s milk curdling,
fly with the crows, you get shot with the crows
as he fed the chooks, gloating.
Well, birds fly south for the summer,
and not this time, we’re roosting up north,
safe on our parochial perches.
Who’s laughing now? eh eh eh?
We already have your footballers
locked in our hubs –
yet laugh too soon, maties, and the boot
can be on the other foot in a few days …
Pride is the deadliest, most subtle sin.
Plagues follow science, not rhetoric in tabloid beatups,
thrive on denial, superstition, conspiracist ignorance.
Fertilised by desperation, selfishness and carelessness,
the toll is belling for us all.

Jinjirrie, August 2020

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Under Western Capitalism, White Lives Matter Most

Australian Settler Coat of Arms

The Settler

First they wanted me to hate on Aboriginals because they lived on land I wished to farm in my British way.
Kill them, poison them, send them to missions, enslave them on *my* properties.

Then they wanted me to hate on China because the pig-tailed Chinese came here to take *our* white gold.
Massacre them, hunt them down – let Lambing Flat be a lesson to them.

Then they wanted me to hate on Islanders better used here toiling as slaves on *my* cane plantations.
Let them live apart from me, and if they rebel, kill them.

Then they wanted me to hate on Europeans because they weren’t proper British whitey like me.
Send them to Silver City, Villawood and the factories.

Then they wanted me to hate on Vietnamese because the US said so.
Kill the commies, they are against my bulging property portfolio.

Then they wanted me to hate on Iraqis, Palestinians, Iranians and Muslims because the US said so.
I have powerful mates with big guns. I like big guns.

Now they want me to hate on China again because the US empire is falling and the West needs all the gold, always.
I hate. I am obedient. It is my gold too. I am capitalism. I am colonialism. I am imperialism. I am a statue in your town. White blokes are the best. I am the war on terror. I am terror.

Jinjirrie, June 2020

Relevant Australian Racism Links

Gamilaroi man, Luke Pearson:

‘White supremacy then and white supremacy now, is an innate belief in the superiority of whiteness, sorry, of Western civilisation. This is why we are so often told that we should be thankful for invasion. That it was a good thing, because without invasion I wouldn’t have an iPhone! Without white invasion, we’d still be ‘stuck in the past,’ or even worse, we might have been invaded by ‘the Chinamen,’ (which I’ve been assured would have been way worse for us because, apparently, ‘in comparison with white races’ they are ‘unequal and inferior’).’

Gareth Evans on rising sinophobia in Australia.